How To Deal With Negative Emotions

February 27, 2019 | By More

Part 2 of 2

It’s all about releasing those feelings, defragging your system So when it comes down to anger, anger has been linked to coronary heart disease and heart attacks. It actually does have a physical correlation to your health if you’re carrying around a lot of anger in your system. You’re probably also releasing a lot of adrenalin, and adrenalin can be very useful at times. Yet when you’re just sitting at home ruminating about that person who gave you the evil eye, the stink eye, or the crook eye, or that person who didn’t call you back and you’re playing that movie inside your head, your body starts to release adrenalin that gives you that fight or flight or freeze and you’ve got no way of really disbursing it because you’re just sitting in your couch ruminating over it. It’s not like back into evolution when that adrenalin rush would come because there’d be a lion or tiger coming after you. Then it’s appropriate to have that adrenalin so you get the heck out of there. You could stay to fight that tiger, lion, or bear, with everything that you had to try and give you a semblance of chance or survival.

The amount of anger that most of us carry around is completely inappropriate. We are not responding to the issue. The map is not the territory. We’re bringing that backlog, that rucksack of stones, of accumulated anger, and we’re bringing that into a situation.

We’ve all heard the story of road rage. I remember growing up hearing the story of Jack Nicholson. He was driving. He got out of his car, and he picked up a golf club, I guess, that he had in the back of his car and he started to smash up the guy’s car in front of him because the guy, I think, had just cut him off. And do you think that that was the appropriate amount of rage for that situation, or do you think Mr. Jack Nicholson loved him to death? Or do you think that maybe he had a backlog of unresolved anger that had he hadn’t dealt with?  Had he let go of it perhaps he wouldn’t have reacted with quite the intensity. I’m hoping you’ve never overreacted to things in your life in an angry way.

There’s nothing wrong with the emotion. It’s not that it’s bad, it’s not that it’s good. It’s useful. It’s just not useful to keep in your system for too long because it’s going to hurt you physically, it will hurt you mentally, as well.

Then there is sadness. It’s appropriate to have sadness sometimes, you know, and perhaps you’re grieving for somebody. Perhaps there’s been a big loss in your life on some level – a job, a partnership for example. It’s appropriate sometimes to feel sadness in all disguises. You’re a human being, you’re allowed to feel a kaleidoscope of emotions. But when it comes to sadness, an example is grief. Say you’ve lost somebody you loved dearly who has passed away, it’s appropriate. It’s appropriate to grieve him and it’s appropriate to be sad for a little bit but should you be sad for the rest of your life, every moment of every day because that person is gone? No, that’s not appropriate. That will destroy your life. I’m sure that person who passed away that was dear to you wouldn’t want that for you either.

So it’s about appropriateness, to the appropriate the situation. Imagine you had the ability to clear out, defrag, to unpearl that necklace, if you will, of all of those times, of all that emotional intensity so you could react to a situation for what that situation was at that particular day, that particular time. And then you let it go. Because there’s a great quote that is real wisdom about having the memory but release from emotion. That’s real wisdom. You have the lesson, you have the learning. And once you get the lesson, once you get the learning from the emotion, you don’t have to keep re-experiencing that with the same intensity. That’s like the metaphor I like to use about the emotions. You’ve got that necklace and all of those little beads, those pearls are coming out and other times where you’ve been sad, in some form, grieving, depressed, or depressed in yourself. And it’s really about coming by and talking it out – not just taking out the pearls because that takes forever. It’s forms of therapy, psychotherapy where you’ll be talking about everything that ever made you sad from the moment you were in your mum’s womb until session number 227 and you still feel like uncomfortable. No, it takes a long time. There’s transformational technology. It’s like hypnosis out there to name just a few where you go in and literally pull out that thread that’s holding all those necklaces together. So all those beads, all those rotten pearls just disappear and you can start again with the appropriate amount of emotion for that time. Depression has been…there’s a strong correlation with depression and depressing your immune system, having a weakened immune system. There are different forms of cancer that people have done studies on. So it actually affects you physically when you keep depressing yourself.

Always Believe,

Luke Michel Howard PhD

Ottawa Clinical Hypnotist

Category: Articles, Health & Natural Therapies

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